Question 1

How does therapy help?

Accepted Answer

Improved mental health: Developing coping skills and strategies to manage symptoms of mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. It can also help you gain insight into the root causes of these issues and develop a better understanding of yourself.
Better relationships: Increasing communication skills, developing healthy  boundaries, and improving conflict resolution, which can better your relationships with family members, friends, and romantic partners. Helps develop better social skills overall.
Increased self-awareness: Improving your  understanding of your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and behaviors, which can lead to greater self-awareness and self-acceptance.
Enhanced problem-solving skills: Developing problem-solving skills that you can use to address a wide range of issues in your life, from work stress to relationship problems.
Greater sense of purpose: Identifying your values, strengths, and goals, which can give you a greater sense of purpose and direction in life

Question 2

How do I get the most out of therapy?

Accepted Answer

Getting the most out of therapy requires committing to the therapeutic process and being willing to invest the time, energy, and effort necessary to achieve your therapeutic goals. This may include doing work outside of therapy sessions, such as completing homework assignments or practicing new skills learned in therapy. Similar to learning a new language, it is important to take what you learn in therapy and continue practicing new skills and tools in your everyday life.

To get the most out of therapy it is important to be as present and engaged in the therapy process as you can be. This means being open and honest, being willing to explore your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and being willing to confront and work through difficult emotions and experiences. This can be challenging, but it is a necessary part of the healing process.

Question 3

How do I know if it's a "good fit" between me and my therapist?

Accepted Answer

Listen to your gut. After reaching out to a new therapist, I suggest clients meet with a new therapist for at least 1-2 months and then check in with themselves on how they felt in the relationship and in the space. What did you like, or not like about it? Do I feel like I can or want to be open with my therapist? Do I feel heard and seen? This can also be a conversation with your therapist and they may provide insight that helps you find a better fit. Ultimately, my goal is for you to find someone with whom you can heal and grow, regardless of whether that is me or another practitioner.

Question 4

What if I don't want to talk about something?

Accepted Answer

Firstly, relax. It's okay to be protective of yourself and feel scared when opening up!

What we don't want to talk about can sometimes be just as important as what we do talk about. Part of therapy is learning to explore and  integrate parts of ourselves and our experiences that we would otherwise actively avoid. Avoidance functions as an effective defense, especially when learning to be vulnerable with a new person. It is a reaction we want to honor and be curious about, because it has helped you get to where you are. Avoidance can be connected to shame and act as an obstacle to how you want to live and be, so the very thing you want to avoid may be the thing you need to confront in order to grow and change. Therapy provides opportunities to confront  your obstacles while cultivating self-compassion and acceptance.

When encountering avoidance, I take great care that the pacing of confrontation is consensual and grounded by sitting in the discomfort, not in the pain. We center your internal experience as a guide for pacing and in how we approach and discuss topics.

Question 5

How long will I need to be in therapy to see positive results?

Accepted Answer

TL;DR: Clients often feel relief soon after starting therapy, and depending on goals clients may see positive results in as little as 1 year of weekly treatment. Treatment with me typically lasts 2-3 years.

That answer is dependent on many factors, including but not limited to: treatment goals, treatment pace, engagement in and outside of therapy (i.e. practicing skills), and how you define positive results.

I find that clients typically experience immediate relief after starting therapy, even when overwhelmed by the experience of being vulnerable. It’s important to know that getting to know you holistically and building trust in our relationship is part of the process for cultivating a space for healing can take months to years, and comes with its own positive results; including an increased awareness of your needs and your emotional experiences, communication skills and boundary setting, new coping skills and strategies, deeper insight into origins of pain, etc.

As trust and safety is established and you feel more open to sharing and being vulnerable then the “real work” begins. In this stage you’ll work towards what is needed to heal and meet your goals, which typically involves being vulnerable, honest, and also uncomfortable. For many, this stage is emotionally difficult at times, but may be a necessary part of your process as you work through obstacles and challenges. Regardless, clients report feeling more emotional stability with increased confidence and ability to cope with intense emotions, as well as feeling better able to develop and maintain healthy connections with themselves and others.

Question 6

Do I need Therapy?

Accepted Answer

It is natural to ask "does therapy work? If so, will it work for me?" I view therapy as an effective tool and practice that focuses on alleviating suffering and/or improving understanding of oneself and well-being. There are a lot of benefits that come from being in therapy, whether you have specific goals or are looking to unpack and process. An important follow-up question is, do you want therapy? Or is someone else telling you to go? You are responsible for your healing process and if you’re not interested and invested in going to therapy then it’s probably not for you at this time and that’s okay. There are many other ways to process, reflect, and heal.

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